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Culture on the Cheap
Bed-Stuy Photo du Jour: Here Comes The Sun!
Filed under: Bed-Stuy
From Bedford Avenue.
Miss Heather
The Theologian of Bedford Stuyvesant
Filed under: Bed-Stuy
There is no one thing that has pitted man against his fellow man more effectively than the subject of religion. In fact, I am frequently of the mind that the world would be a hell of a lot better without it. The way I see it, squabbling about what god likes is a pretty futile endeavor. Arguing over what he dislikes is downright asinine. The previous having been said, there is person on Bainbridge Street whose theological views I wholeheartedly endorse.
AMEN!
Now go out and buy some flowers. Why not hang some new drapes as well? For god’s sake run a comb through that hair and put on some make-up! Get it together people!
Miss Heather
Greenpoint Speaks Out About The Media
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Today, dear readers, I have the pleasure of getting some dental work done. I’ll be upfront: I am no lover of needles, drills and the like. In fact, they terrify the bejesus out of me. Wishing to mitigate the anxiety I was already experiencing late yesterday afternoon, I popped out to purchase a bottle of wine. This is what I found as I was coming home.
It is moments like this that make me proud to be a Greenpointer. So much for the New York Post— they’re Garden Spot’s bitch now!
Miss Heather
Behold, The Bed-Stuy Beer Bong!
I was originally going to feature this nugget of institutional architectural bliss as this week’s installment of Fedder’s Friday but since it is raining I felt is was better served by being showcased today. Last weekend my husband and I entertained a friend of ours from out of town. Wishing to be good hosts, we wanted to give our guest the quintessential New York Shitty experience. In other words, we took him on a grand tour of the finest Fedders Specials this city has to offer.
It was on Quincy Street that we found this, the benchmark for all things Fedders.
As you can see all the required elements are present:
- Exposed electrical meters
- Nary a lick of greenery to be found
- Burglar bars
- And of course, Fedders boxes
But there is something that makes this property stand head and shoulders above its compatriots. A little “added value” if you will. Can you find it? I’ll give you a hint: look closely at the gutter on the left-hand side of the building.
I know what you’re thinking:
My god, that is one helluva design flaw!
I beg to differ. I am by my very nature an optimistic person. I prefer to see the (shot) glass half full— if for no other reason because that’s when I know it’s time to order another one.
What we have here, dear readers, may very well be the world’s largest beer bong. Belly up to the bar New Yorkers, I bet these folks throw the best damned Fourth of July barbecues in town!
Miss Heather
Bed-Stuy Photo du Jour: Books or Bubblegum?
Filed under: Bed-Stuy
From Madison Street.
Miss Heather
Chinatown Photo du Jour: 10 In A Row
Filed under: Area 51
A little something to encourage our friends Texas, Rhode Island, Vermont and Ohio to get out and vote today.
Miss Heather
Photo Credit: Richard Kershenbaum
Lost: Small White Fluffy Dog
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Anyone who has walked down Manhattan Avenue today has probably noticed a large number of lost dog fliers have been posted. In fact, between Java Street and Greenpoint Avenue they can be found approximately every fifteen feet.
For those of you who have yet to see these missives they look like this…
this…
and this.
Before I proceed, let it be known that being an animal person myself, I have nothing but the utmost sympathy for someone who has lost a pet. The previous having been said (or in this case, written), I do have to wonder what kind of person would honestly believe the above illustration and descriptive phrase “fluffy white” is going to be helpful in getting his (or her) dog back. In any case as luck would have it the above question was answered when I made a right turn onto Greenpoint Avenue.
In all seriousness folks, there are people in this borough whose livelihood is stealing dogs (small pure breds) and selling them. Please do not leave your dog unattended. What you might (not) find when you come out from the laundromat or grocery store will be no laughing matter. Just ask this guy*.
Miss Heather
*If anyone has seen this small fluffy dog or know of its whereabouts (I am presuming he/she was taken Sunday, March 2), please contact his (or her) owner. He is clearly heartbroken. Thanks.
Bushwick Photos du Jour: Intimations of Gentrification
Filed under: Bushwick
Yesterday we explored the differences between Greenpoint and Buckwick’s animal statuary. For those of you who have not read this post, the following photograph (from Bushwick) will bring you (somewhat) up to speed.
I really like the heavy chains. Were they placed around this dog’s neck to prevent theft or to keep him from mauling some innocent passerby? I suppose only his owner knows for certain. Speaking of dog owners, as I was walking down Decatur Street recently I made an important realization:
Bushwick dog owners are even scarier than their canine counterparts. Yes sir, when I see signs like this the first word that comes to my mind is gentrification. After all, once you begin to find mass produced signs invoking threats of physical violence in a neighborhood, you can rest assured luxury condominiums (and Fresh Direct) are soon to follow.
Thank goodness an upstanding citizen on Bushwick Avenue is keeping it real. “Who needs a hoity toity sign?” this person asked, “As long as I have my trusty Sharpie marker any flat surface will convey what I have to say.”
This is what I call kicking knocking it old style!
Miss Heather
The Mayor of Bushwick Avenue
Filed under: Bushwick
I am certain a number of my friends to the south are familiar with this strip of row houses. They are located on Bushwick Avenue between Menahan And Bleecker Street. In fact, I imagine a number of subway patrons pass these nondescript buildings every day as they commute via the J train. What they probably do not know is a mayor of New York City once lived in one of them.
His name was John F. Hylan. He was the 96th Mayor of New York City and this modest domicile (at 959 Bushwick Avenue) was his home. Here’s an incredibly concise biography of “Red Mike” (as he was known) from Wikipedia:
Hylan was born in Hunter, New York a town in upstate Greene County where his family owned a farm. Hylan married young, became dissatisfied with farm life and moved to Brooklyn with his bride. He found work on the Brooklyn Union Elevated Railroad and rose through the ranks to become a locomotive engineer. Ambitious, he studied law even as he worked on the railroad. He was fired after allegedly taking a curve too fast, endangering a supervisor who had been preparing to cross a track. Hylan always contended that he was wrongfully discharged (Some versions of the story have him reading his law book at the same time as driving).
Despite his industriousness, he was described, even by his friends, as a mediocre intellect. Nevertheless, he became a judge in the Kings County (Brooklyn) county court and was in that position when he was tapped by Tammany Hall as a dark-horse candidate for Mayor, running as a Democrat, through the promotion of newspaper magnate William Randolph Hearst, who shared with him a desire for municipal ownership of utilities.
Hylan defeated the reformer John Purroy Mitchel in the 1917 mayoral election, restoring the power of Tammany at City Hall. He easily won re-election in 1921 but was defeated for re-nomination in 1925 by State Senator James J. “Jimmy” Walker. Walker later appointed Hylan to the municipal judiciary.
As mayor, Hylan railed against “the interests” and put in motion the building of a publicly owned and operated subway system, which became the IND division of the New York City Subway. Hylan Boulevard on Staten Island was named for him.
Interested to learn more about Mr. Hylan the Mayor I dug around the New York Times online archives. Most of what I found was exceptionally dull. I suppose this shouldn’t have been too surprising: even his own friends conceded the 96th mayor of New York City was a bit of a dolt. Or was he? Read the following article from the April 23, 1916 edition of the New York Times (dating from Mr. Hylan’s tenure as a Kings County judge) and draw your own conclusions.
…Are we now to be deprived of our personal liberty, the privacy of family and home, by a spy system imposed on us by public officials? If this is to be tolerated, what will the end be?
Excellent question Mr. Hylan. It is (almost) 100 years later and I find myself asking this very question.
Miss Heather
Bed-Stuy Pay Phone du Jour: Bainbridge Street
Filed under: Bed-Stuy
As I was knocking around Bedford Stuyvesant this lovely and unseasonably warm afternoon I found myself getting a little peckish. Actually, I was ravenous. That’s the reason why I ducked into the local Subway franchise on Broadway. As I negotiated my way through the line one of the employees said:
The short woman is first.
Thinking they were speaking about yours truly I looked around confusedly. Then I looked down and deduced who they were talking about: a woman who (maybe) came up to my elbow. She could barely see above the counter. She was, indeed, very short. She made me look Michael Jordan.
It is a hard knock life for little people. I should know: I am one of them. Therefore, you can imagine my joy when I noticed a pay phone just down the street that had been retrofitted to better serve people of diminuative stature.
That kiosk looks like it was hit by a car.
This is probably because it was. You can always count on Bedford Stuyvesant to find new and innovative ways to jack up public pay phones. In fact they give us Greenpointers a serious run for our money.
Get cracking Garden Spotters!
Miss Heather
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