Greenpoint
Lorven Pharmacy
Culture on the Cheap
Word Of The Day: Pimpification
pimpification (pimp’-if-fic-ka-shen) n. Customizing a standard turn of the century four story walk-up using large quantities of stucco, glass and chrome. The end product should be jarringly out of context and garish, if not downright bizarre. —pimp’-i-fy’ v. (ified, fying, -fies) Not to be confused with crapification. See: Green Street.
First came the stucco and chrome. I called it Fedderized.
Then they painted the curb yellow and wrote “No Parking 24/7”. My neighbor parked there anyway. She got a ticket. She called the city; they got a citation and were ordered to correct it. Now the sidewalk reads “Parking 24/7”.
Then came the awning and garbage can holder.
I called these hilarious.
Finally the fancy doorbell next to an institutional grey sheet metal door caught my eye. Then it hit me: this was no mere act of crapification. This was something more.
This building has been PIMPIFIED!
Miss Heather
Greenpoint Fashion Watch: Times Are A’ Changin!
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
The first thing that struck me about Greenpoint is the affection the people (women primarily) have for wearing leopard print. My fair burgh is known for a number of things (drunks, Polish people and pollution to name a few); I would like to humbly suggest that this eccentric fashion sensibility be added to the list. If I had the money I would open a leopard print emporium. I would not lack customers, take this woman for example.
The above photograph was taken by yours truly back in 2006. Granted, things have changed quite a bit here in the last two years. The Garden Spot has become COOL— and as a result it has undergone an unprecedented spate of luxurification. I see a lot of new faces nowadays. Here’s one such newbie I spied last weekend.
I guess the more things change in Greenpoint the more they stay the same. This dude’s ‘do was quite remarkable. This photograph hardly does it justice.
Miss Heather
P.S.: I’d like to give a big shout out to this Hasidic gentlemen I saw on Eagle Street yesterday. I will not profess to understand his religious practices (as a feminist I find them troubling), but any guy man enough to carry a Hello Kitty bag in public is A-OK by my book. I always knew Hello Kitty would be the one to unite us all!
Those pink things are hearts.
Rock on, Greenpoint!
Thanks But No Thanks. Really. I Mean it.
Mr. Heather pulled a graveyard shift and then some working from home yesterday. As a result I did not have computer access until 8:00 p.m. When I finally got around to checking my email I found a real gem. It was entitled “domain for sale?” Uncle Paulie* writes:
Hi Miss Heather,
I stumbled across your site and was interested in seeing if you would sell the domain name newyorkshitty.com. If so, please let me know. I am willing to pay $1,000.
I wasn’t interested so I didn’t reply. Nonetheless I received this (unsolicited) update at midnight:
Hi Miss Heather, please disregard my email, I ended up buying a different domain name. Have a good day.
What did Paulie expect me to do? Trip over my keyboard, flail my arms and scream OH, OH, OH! Horshack style in the hopes of accepting his generous offer? I don’t think so.
The thought I might have some attachment to this url clearly never crossed this chap’s mind. Such is the joy that is capitalism; it affords no value to “art” or personal enjoyment— unless greenbacks are involved. New York Shitty is my brain child; it is the place I share what I love (and hate) about living in New York City. For wont of a better way of putting it: newyorkshitty.com is a part of my life. It is a diary of my mental diarrhea.
For better or worse New York Shitty will persist. And for the record, it has been much better than worse. I have met some WONDERFUL (and powerful) north Brooklyn lasses (like this, this, this and this) as a result.
One grand doesn’t even begin to cover the joy operating this blog (since April 2006) gives me. Good luck with your new url schmuck. Had you added few zeros to this figure and I might— MIGHT —have considered your offer.
$1,000.
Really?
Miss “Easy But Not Cheap” Heather
*This is not his real name.
Greenpoint Photo du Jour: September Flowers
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
From Milton Street.
Miss Heather
Greenpoint Photos du Jour: Politics
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
From Manhattan Avenue.
From Green Street.
Miss Heather
Greenpoint Photo du Jour: Green Street
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Looks like “Franky” either got loose or was priced out by gentrification. I wonder how much the price per square foot is in Greenpoint for quality gimp digs nowadays.
Or perhaps renting gimp-quarters or getting a time share is a more economical choice given the current state of the real estate market.
Thoughts anyone?
Miss Heather
THIS WEEKEND: Sunnyside Shorts
This is a quick reminder that this Saturday, September 6, the Sunnyside Shorts Film Festival will be taking place at the Sunnyside Gardens Park in (care to guess) Sunnyside, Queens.
The show starts at sunset (approximately 8:00 p.m.) and early arrivers will be treated to “traditional harp music” courtesy of Donie Carroll, Dan Neely and members of The Washington Square Harp and Shamrock Orchestra. This event is absolutely free and you can get more details by clicking here.
Miss Heather
P.S.: For those of you looking for a little something to quaff tonight Dandy Wine will be hosting another tasting right here in Greenpoint. Here are the deets per the email I received this morning:
My girl Melissa will be here pouring three lovely wines, all from different regions and different varieties, but all wonderful just the same. Here is the line-up for FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 5th, 2008:
1. MARTIN CODAX, ALBARINO 2006, RIAX BAIXAS, SPAIN (Martin Codax was a 13th century Galician troubadour, whose romantic works spoke of the inherent beauty of the Spanish countryside and coast. The name    was given to the winery that produces this refreshingly dry Albarino. Tart on the tongue, with nice round juicy fruits of citrus, peach, and pear! Yummmm.) $13
2. GHOST PINES, CHARDONNAY 2006, CALIFORNIA (This is a winemaker’s blend; sourcing the best fruit from Sonoma, Napa, and Monterey counties. Flavors of baked apples, crisp pear, and creamy oak.) $19
3. GASCON, MALBEC 2007, MENDOZA ARGENTINA (Since 1884, Gascon has been recognized for the rich, smooth flavors that come from this high altitude vineyard situated along the Cordillera of the Andes Mountains. Full-bodied and elegant, this Malbec has layers of blackberry, blueberry, dark cherry and mocha. Perfect wine for FALL!!!) $14
If you missed last week’s tasting due to travel, apathy, or lack of email, you must come for a visit and drink some wine, eat some cheese, and meet your fellow Greenpointers! All the cool kids are doing it… it’s the best happy hour in town!
We’ll be pouring wine from 6 PM – 9 PM. Hope to see you there. We are located at 153 Franklin Street between India and Java in beautiful Greenpoint, Brooklyn.
And if you can’t make it to the tasting, be sure to drop by soon, we have a lot of new wine to check out.
Photo Credit: Sunnyside Shorts dot net
Photos du Jour: Can I Has Cheezburger?
Quay Street, Greenpoint.
5th Street, Long Island City.
Miss Heather
I Can’t Help It: Sarah Palin Is The New Crack!
Welcome to the New Whirled Odor!
This old coot cracks me up.
I left Texas in 1996. I moved to New York City in search of a better life (and a MFA). I got both: albeit in installments. I have lived in the Bronx, Queens and Brooklyn. My life was rough at times but I never, EVER wanted to go back to this.
Can you blame me?
Miss Heather
Brooklyn Photos du Jour: Something For The Kids
From Dekalb Avenue, Bedford Stuyvesant, August 21, 2008.
From Manhattan Avenue, Greenpoint, September 3, 2008.
Miss Heather
NYS Flickr Pool
You must be logged in to post a comment.