From The New York Shitty Inbox: Discovery At East River State Park

March 16, 2015 ·
Filed under: 11211, 11249, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn, Wow, WTF 

deadchicken1cp nys

A fellow named Chris writes on March 15th (AKA: The Ides of March):

What is with all these dead birds being found? Saw this today on the waterfront of the east river state park. The next photo, you may not want to look at while eating.

deadchicken2cp nys

Indeedy. Clean up in aisle five…

Seriously folks, why? How? Ew.

From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: The Other Side

April 28, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11249, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

Taken by Grzegorz Fryzel.

The Credulity Files: As Gleaned From Craigslist & The North Brooklyn Community Group

October 25, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11211, 11249, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn, Wow, WTF 


If there is one thing yours truly really loves, it is a really good prank. Especially one that makes light of how ridiculous the monetization of our parks has become. CASE IN POINT: the response this solicitation (albeit updated) received on the North Brooklyn Community Group on Facebook.

NBCCG String

New York Shitty Analysis:

  • At a very casual glance I fell for this. After all, I have been suggested to “like” Motherburg,,,



  • and I no longer rule out any event as being so ridiculous or totally irrelevant to the community here if it is “artsy”. Or more importantly: garners revenue.
  • By all appearances it would appear other people hereabouts harbor the same mindset. Rather sad, isn’t it?
  • Nonetheless, we harbor it for a reason. Our community’s parks, as few as they are, are being disproportionately monetized for events which cater to people— lots of people— who reside outside the community. More specifically their: capacious wallets. What do we, as citizens, get out of this arrangement? Not much as far as I can tell.
  • In any case props go out to Joe Lentol for actually looking into this. This is what a public servant should do!

From The New York Shitty Photo Pool, Part II: Brooklyn Flea

April 16, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11211, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

Brooklyn Flea 2013, Williamsburg: Angel

Taken by Scoboco.

From The New York Shitty Inbox: The East River State Park Lights

October 7, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11211, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

This item comes courtesy of a very nice lady named Jackie. The residents around East River State Park have a problem; very simply put, it is the solar lighting which was installed at said park to keep it lit at night. To this end they have been remarkably effective! In fact, they have been described to yours truly as “lighting up East River State Park like Yankee Field”. Hence why an online petition has been created requesting a more sensible solution be put in place. Here’s what Jackie has to say:

I am told the State used the $200,000 OSA donation towards the solar lights.The state was addressing community chatter  a few years ago about wanting more access to the Park, longer days, and for that the State requires lighting. But there was no public forum that I know of. If the state had spoken to the community they would have realized that in the summer the park closes at sunset which is around 9pm, but all folks really wanted was to be able to stay in the park and watch the sun set, instead of being asked to leave 10 minutes prior. There is sufficient light during dusk to allow this. In the winter when the sun sets early, the Park is usually very cold, extremely windy and sparsely attended, so night access is not a big issue. In addition, the city installed a soccer field adjacent to the East River State Park, with large stadium style soccer lights that also light up the entire State Park and beyond and bounce off of THE EDGE building, causing a lot of light pollution. These lights are suppose to be turned off at 10:15PM. It seems the State and City do not work in concert so this was not factored in. In addition, the stadium lights stay on well past the 10:15PM time frame, as the timer is not reset to adjust to the shorter days and often is on until midnight or all night. These are electric lights that cost taxpayers dollars, that are on during snowstorms when there is no use of the soccer fields. These lights blare into bedrooms and also ruin the evening city skyscapes. But I digress.

Now these towering industrial solar poles in the park close off what was OPEN SPACE. Frisbee anyone? Williamsburg is a central hub of print and film shoots and a popular place for the industry to film. Yea, you can retouch out a pole or two in print, but not in film. “They ruined it”, said a location scout. The sun panels on top of these poles have a mirror quality and on sunny days it throw 50 rays of molten light into people’s homes. One sun is enough, thank you. Visually,  the amount and placement makes the park look like a DOT parking lot, or some have described it as a UFO center. Many were placed next to trees that will overshadow the solars and render them useless.

There are many solutions to this problem, and the petition is meant to be a calling card so that the community can get a meaningful dialog going with the State.

Those of you who are interested can add your signature to this petition by clicking here.

PHOTO CREDITS: the solar panel photo comes courtesy of Blue4Rose.

Quicklink: Today In The New York Times

May 29, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11211, Culture War, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

I knew this story was in the works for some time but as of this morning it is online! My favorite sound bite:

You can’t hear yourself think. Not only do they come feeling good, they leave feeling better…

Read it for yourself. Closing on a related note, I am pleased to announce a new “friends of” group has been established for East River State Park! Here’s the announcement I received from a very nice lady named Julie Lawrence.

Friends of East River State Park Inaugural Meeting
Thursday, June 2, 2011 starting at 7:00 p.m.
110 Kent Avenue, second floor
Brooklyn, New York 11211

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Because 24 Hours Notice Is Apparently Enough*

May 17, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11211, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

This item was received by yours truly from a member of Community Board 1 at 1:11 p.m. It was received by him/her, in turn, at 12:30 p.m. Tomorrow, May 18th at 6:30 p.m. the folks at Open Space Alliance will be having a community meeting regarding its waterfront concerts. Stay informed– attend the meeting!

O.S.A./Community Meeting On Concerts
May 18, 2011 starting at 6:30 p.m.
Swinging 60’s Center
211 Ainslie Street
Brooklyn, New York 11211

UPDATE, 2:36 p.m.: I have received an email from one of the co-chairs of OSA’s Community Committee. It casts this flier in a rather curious light:

As the Outgoing Co-Chair of the OSA’s Community Committee, I want to provide an important correction to the flyer.  Tomorrow’s meeting is a  previously scheduled quarterly meeting of OSA’s Community Committee.     What happens at at these meetings?  We receive updates on various parks projects and bring to attention to volunteer activities.

Not sure who the creator of the flyer is but if people are interested in the Community Committee or learning more about being involved in the park, please email me at 

I would recommend people looking for a meeting about the Concerts, should direct those inquiries directly to OSA staff  and board.  The Community Committee are just a bunch of volunteers try to improve our parks.

You can view the agenda for this meeting (which seems to have nothing whatsoever to do with concerts) by clicking here.

Miss Heather

*It isn’t.

Live From The 94th Precinct Community Council Meeting

Don’t let the above image of our Community Council hard at work fool you: it was a particularly informative and eventful evening at Greenpoint’s very own Church of the Ascension.

First, the minutes from last month’s meeting were read. Then we got down to business.

Part I: The Correspondence Secretary maked announcements, a new date and location for forthcoming Community Council meetings (as of September) is announced and Pat McDonald of Outreach Speaks

1. The Correspondence Secretary Speaks:

  • As of May 23, 2011 smoking will not be allowed in Parks Department facilities. A $50.00 fine will be levied for offenders.
  • People whose properties are afflicted by graffiti can call 311 to have it removed.
  • An admonishment against crimes of opportunity is made.
  • The program of the month is a summer camp for youths between 10 and 16 years of age. The purpose is to foster better relations between youths and our Finest.

2. The head Mistress of the Community Council makes a couple of announcements:

  • As of September the Community Council meetings will be conducted the third Tuesday of every month in the rear room of the Church of the Ascension accessible via Java Street.
  • The rally to protest the 200 bed homeless assessment center at 400 McGuinness Boulevard will come to pass May 22nd at 2:30 p.m.

3. Pat McDonald speaks from Greenpoint’s very own Outreach Program (which is located at 960 Manhattan Avenue) speaks.

  • This facility works with substance abusers of all ages (including teenagers) and has English, Polish and Spanish speaking counselors.
  • A domestic violence program (which is sorely needed) is in the works.
  • Outreach also offers 12 Step Programs.

Part 2: Lincoln Restler Speaks

  • Mr. Restler gives props to the 94th for addressing issues arising in north Greenpoint especially pertaining to drug traffic.
  • Mr. Restler mentions the (now) kiboshed moratorium on liquor licenses but notes that a more aggressive response is needed to problematic establishments.
  • An audience member inquires Mr. Restler as to the status of the Brooklyn Night Bazaar. (It isn’t happening.)

Part 3: D.I. Hurson Gives the Low-down

  • D.I. Hurson give props to the Narcotics Division and citizens for helping to crack down on drug activity.
  • He mentions a seizure of crack cocaine on Metropolitan Avenue.
  • D. I. Hurson addresses what the 94th can do in regards to problematic bars.
    • To this end they will be having a sit-down with the Department of Consumer Affairs so as to better understand the laws which govern our local watering holes.
    • D. I. Hurson gives a reminder about the MARCH Program. (Look it up, folks!)
    • Bedford Avenue is specifically mentioned. D.I. Hurson states he was at North 7 Street and Bedford Avenue May 15th 2:00 a.m. He liked it to “Times Square”. He noted that the bulk of citations issued in this area are for open containers and public urination.
  • We’re up with Park Slope with being down with crime!
  • But he notes a woman was rather violently robbed after exiting Kellogg Diner.
  • Car break-ins: eight arrests in four weeks.
  • A gent who opted for drug rehabilitation (versus 1 1/2 years jail time) opted to escape and was apprehended.
  • Then of course the subject of the OSA’s East River State Parks concerts* arose:
    • This year police officers will be on hand to ensure prompt egress from said concerts.
    • The port-o-lets will (hopefully) be relocated closer to the entrance of East River State Park so merrymakers will not relieve themselves on neighboring properties’ stoops, foliage, etc.

Part 4: The Q & A session begins!

  • A lady from Noble and Lorimer Street mentions a number of unlicensed cars being present on her block. “This car is not stolen, do not tow it… mind your own business”. (priceless)
  • A woman in the audience brings up the matter of Skinheads and gangs inciting violence (because her son was beaten prior to this meeting). Not cool.
  • A Kent Street resident mentions the (recurring) homeless problem.
  • D. I. Hurson reiterates that people should call the police.
  • Ms. McDonald adds her two cents.
  • Rami Metal (of Steve Levin’ office) speaks.
    • He states that Mr. Levin has been meeting with various city agencies about this issue.
    • Not all seemingly homeless people are, in fact, homeless.
    • Mr. Metal notes that the issue Mr. Levin has with the proposed homeless intake center at 400 McGuinness Boulevard is it will not help these individuals. They are largely Polish-speaking, have roots in Greenpoint and care not to leave here.
    • All discussions with the DHS (Department of Homeless Services) has proven to be fruitless.
    • Ms. McDonald notes that one such individual did receive shelter at a 360 house because was willing to stop drinking.
    • Mr. Metal notes a number of the people in question are undocumented and as such do not qualify for assistance. To this end Levin’s office has reached out to the Polish Consulate.
    • The stalwart 94th Community Council attendee (of whom I am a big fan), Phyllis, kicks things up a notch by proposing work camps be used to employ our local homeless/inebriates and giving props to Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
    • Both Mr. Metal and D.I. Hurson concur that F.D.R. was an excellent president.

Part 5: Steve Levin Speaks

  • Another attendee wants to know if there is a way our inebriates can be mandated to stop drinking (in order to get housing and work).
  • Councilman Levin points out that these men are not breaking the law and as such a program is not feasible.
  • Mr. Levin counters that community-based resources need to be employed for Greenpoint’s homeless/inebriates. Most of whom are Polish-speaking. He also notes the only homeless shelter which provides a Polish-speaking employee is located in East New York.
  • Mr. Levin talks about “Common Ground”. A homeless outreach program which has identified 40-45 “chronic public inebriates” in the Garden Spot.
  • Once again: while seeming to be homeless, a number of the aforementioned folks are not. They have family here; it is their drinking that leads them to the streets.
  • Mr. Levin notes that two homeless men died in Greenpoint last winter and presses that the Department of Homeless Services look at community-based options for helping the homeless.
  • Mr. Levin notes that the proposed assessment center for 400 McGuinness Boulevard will not help Greenpoint’s homeless/unhoused.
  • The Greenpoint Hotel, a SRO, and the neighboring 3/4 quarter house is discussed (This is interesting, folks. Do give it a listen!).
  • An attendee states that there are too many homeless shelters and the solution is work (and thus the discussion of work camps is resumed).
  • This chap asserts they should be given a plane ticket and sent back to where they came from. Mr. Levin replied this is not plausible. However, he did add when family members can be found in Poland, he is reaching out to them.
  • Phyllis reiterates the need for work camps.
  • This discussion drags on and Pat McDonald tries to steer the discussion into more productive territory.

Part 6: The Conclusion (READ: more talk of work camps)

  • Pat McDonald continues.
  • Phyllis restates, once again, the need for work camps and points out how it helped her brother (who later fought the Nazis in Italy) and that this came to pass in the Great Depression (which was before Mr. Levin was born).
  • Ms. McDonald tries to rebut.
  • Levin notes local efforts being made with St. Anthony’s Church and the Greenpoint Reformed Church.
  • Mr. Levin segues to the subject of the two hate crimes which came to pass earlier this year , notes that this seems to be part of a larger trend and implores folks that if they see something to contact the police.

And with that, gentle readers, this meeting came to a merciful end.

Miss Heather

Photo Credits: The “Clean and Sober” chaps in pink shirts come courtesy of Markuson’s Blog.

*Whose finances can be perused here.

New York Shitty Day Ender: Ready For The Weekend

May 13, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11211, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 


Taken by spikespikespike.

Miss Heather

Live From Community Board 1: OSA Presents

It was a relatively tame evening last night despite a full house. I made the acquaintance of a New York Times reporter present. He asked me:

Is the turn-out usually like this?

To wit I replied:


He then asked:

How many people are usually here?


Maybe half or one third.

When asked why the turn-out was so large. I told him:

They’re angry.

It has been my observation that citizens do not go to Community Board 1 meetings to give thanks and spread sunshine. Rather, they come to make their presence known because they’re pissed off. This is the north Brooklyn way. In any case, tonight’s spokesperson on the behalf of OSA (Open Space Alliance North Brooklyn) was Adam Perlmutter. This chap is the Secretary for said org and one of the founders of OSA Presents LLC (their concert arm). He spent the evening spreading sunshine— including to yours truly! Without further ado, here he is.

And by all appearances this seems to have mollified the concerned citizens present. Somewhat. Mr. Ricco makes it quite clear he will be keeping an eye on them (do give this a view).

And in a hardly dramatic conclusion the Board takes their recommendations to a vote.

So there have you.

New York Shitty Analysis/Op-Ed/Food For Thought:

  • I found it rather interesting that the one show excised (so as to provide more “family-oriented” entertainment and reduce possibly problematic concert events) was the “Latino” concert. While I am certain concerns about revenue were at play, the fact of the matter is north Brooklyn has a rather large Hispanic population. I am certain they would very much enjoy a concert event with their families. By removing this event from the roster OSA has made a value judgment, gentle readers. I’ll leave it to you deduce what it is.
  • I also found it interesting that Mr. Perlmutter (albeit obliquely— and not by name) called out Jelly NYC as a “concert promoter we did not want to work with” and then proceeded to excoriate them for not operating events in a professional matter. This does not dove-tail with how he felt about this same business in 2009. This makes one wonder why he has had an about-face?
  • I for one am very excited at the prospect of viewing a line item account of OSA’s  expenses and expenditures if for no other reason I want to see exactly how much money (if any) has been allocated for improvements and maintenance of Greenpoint’s parks because I have seen any difference whatsoever.
  • Lastly, so the concerns about quality of life issues arising from the concerts at East River State Park have been allayed— or at least tabled. What about the same issues posed by OSA’s events at other open spaces? In other words: What about the rest of us?

Nonetheless this is a a small— but significant— step forward. Those of you who want a full rundown of last night’s (mind-boggling long) proceedings can get a very nice summary over at A Short Story. Check it out!

Miss Heather

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