Greenpoint Street Seating du Jour: West Street Sectional

The Java Street Drinking Forest is dead.

LONG LIVE THE JAVA STREET DRINKING FOREST!

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox, Part II: Rats at the Astral?

February 16, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Although I have asked this tipster for more information I feel compelled to “crowd-source” this item, which involves one of the Garden Spot’s more renowned buildings: none other than the Astral. J writes:

I’m sure you’ve seen the explosion of rats at the Astral since the blizzard. What can we do to get Astral Apts. or the city to remove the rats?

Actually I have not seen nor heard anything about this— thank god. However, I’d wager the woeful lack of garbage pick-up that followed our blizzard(s) has a lot to do with this. Since J has not indicated where these rats are to be found, I am going to presume they are within the Astral’s premises.

Here’s the deal: New York City apartment dwellers are to having a safe and “livable” domiciles per something called the “Warrant of Habitability”. Here’s a brief run-down of what this entails per RentLaw:

Tenants are entitled to a livable, safe and sanitary apartment. Lease provisions inconsistent with this right are illegal. Failure to provide heat or hot water on a regular basis, or to rid an apartment of insect infestation are examples of a violation of this warranty. Public areas of the building are also covered by the warranty of habitability. The warranty of habitability also applies to cooperative apartments, but not to condominiums. Any uninhabitable condition caused by the tenant or persons under his direction or control does not constitute a breach of the warranty of habitability. In such a case, it is the responsibility of the tenant to remedy the condition. (Real Property Law §235-b)

Although rats are not explicitly stated above, methinks it would be safe to presume they would be classified as vermin just as insects are.  Now let’s take into account that the Astral is a rent-stabilized building and as such J’s means of recourse are a little different than regular New York City apartments. If (or when) this gentlemen calls 311 his complaint will be referred to an entity called Housing Preservation and Development. To keep it stupid simple, this agency oversees public housing and rent-stabilized apartments. This organization will send out an inspector to assess the problem. If he (or she) notes the presence of vermin the building owner will be notified and expected to fix the problem. Exactly how long this process will take is anyone’s guess.

If the problem is not addressed— and HPD has noted the presence of vermin tenants may file for a reduction of his (or her rent) via the Department of Housing and Community Renewal for (and I quote) “decreased services”. This can be filed for individual apartments or building-wide. You can view the requisite forms by clicking here. Yours truly has successfully done this in the past. Be advised it takes several months.

But hopefully it will not come to this for J and his neighbors. It goes without saying that the first thing he and his should do is contact the landlord. In the case of Pistilli Realty (and I have been told this by someone who residents in one of their buildings) the key is to be persistent!

In closing, this is a very general (and laywoman’s) synopsis of what recourse J has for this situation. It should go without saying that if the vermin problem persists he should enlist the services of an attorney. The previous caveat/disclaimer having been made, has anyone in the Astral noted the increased presences of rats? If so I would very much like to hear from you. Please send you accounts and/or photographs to: missheather (at) thatgreenpointblog (dot) com. It goes without saying your identity will remain anonymous if you so desire.

Thanks!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photos du Jour: Java Street, Revisited

February 11, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

The Java Street Drinking Forest (AKA: The Greenpoint Homeless Xmas Tree Intake Center) isn’t quite what it used to be. Nonetheless, if anyone reading this is in the market for a pre-owned Christmas tree they’re still there for the taking— albeit a little worse for wear!

Miss Heather

The Word On The Street, Part II: Politically Incorrect

From Java Street.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: Why?

February 8, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11222, Culture War, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

From India Street.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Feral Mattress Watch: Java Street

February 1, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Special thanks go out to Sherry and Frances Wasserman for bringing this delightful specimen to my attention.

Miss Heather

Spotted On McGuinness Boulevard: Imperialism

January 25, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11222, Abjectecture, Asshole, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Given the spate of rather nasty weather lately yours truly has been spending a great deal of time indoors. Today when the temperature reached a downright balmy 38 degrees I decided to take a little stroll down McGuinness Boulevard. I had a very pleasurable excursion until I reached the intersection of Java Street. This is where I found myself standing in slack-jawed amazement at the following.

Why do the people responsible for this crap think mimicking the Death Star somehow denotes “class”?

I mumbled to myself. Then I proceeded to cross the street so as to take a closer look. That’s when I learned that the above edifice may very well have the same expansionist designs, “Manifest Destiny” if you will, as espoused by Darth Vader, et. al.

Why can I not shake the image of a python unhinging its jaws and slurping down a rather large and unhappy mammal— or perhaps a spider injecting some digestive substance into its victim and waiting for it to rot from within— when I behold the above grotesque? Needless to say I will be watching with rapt interest to see how the guys at 285-303 McGuinness Boulevard (which has racked up a rather impressive number of complaints and a Partial Stop Work Order) will work around this little problem. My prognostication is as follows: if they fuck with their diminutive neighbor’s satellite television it will be war. Provided of course it hasn’t escalated to that level already.

In any case (and to close), I suspect no one will be surprised to know this edifice (which I have christened “The Anacondo”) springs forth from the G-E-N-I-U-S, north Brooklyn’s good friend and Greenpoint’s gift that keeps on giving … (drumroll, please)

Bobby Scarano, stand up please!

Miss Heather

P.S.: Anyone care to place bets as to when Fox News/Murdoch’s Tuskin Raiders send a television crew out to document this atrocity? They point and click in single file (to my web site) to hide their numbers!

Winter Wonderland: Caption This

If you want to see something interesting, head to the western terminus of Java Street. That is where you will find the following.

Anyone care to take a whack at naming this phenomenon? Here’s a couple to get the ball rolling:

The Java Street Drinking Forest

and this, from the mind of a man named Larry:

The Greenpoint Homeless Xmas Tree Intake Center

All submissions can be made via comments or email at: missheather (at) thatgreenpointblog (dot) com.

Miss Heather

P.S.: Wise cracks about the dearth of park space here— or the Parks Department in general— are especially encouraged.

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: <3

January 7, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Street Art 

From Java Street.

Miss Heather

‘Tis The Season: Java Street

December 20, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Taken December 19, 2010.

Miss Heather

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