New York Shitty Street Seating Du Jour: Question of the Day

January 12, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11211, Bloomblight, Street Furniture, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

What do you do when you find a teal colored chaise lounge dumped at your construction site?

Answer: If you are 262 North 9th Street you deposit it across the street!

Miss Heather

Where The Sidewalk Ends

This is the impediment which faced the Mister and I as we endeavored to go to Kenny’s Trattoria last night (we crossed the street because the sidewalk along McCarren Park along Bedford Avenue was a mess). It is located where the Automobile High School ends and Parks Department property astensibly our open space begins. A cordon sanitaire or simple incompetence? I’ll leave you, dear readers, to make the call. All, I’m saying is I saw Parks employees spreading copious amounts of salt at the corner of Bedford Avenue and North 12 Street yesterday morning. Yup.

Miss Heather

P.S. and while I am on the subject:

Where’s the sidewalk? I ask because walking on Union Avenue is friggin’ scary.

There should be a sidewalk here.

You have no idea how grimly amusing I find our mayor facilitating over-development by fly-by-night developers such as the shit heap you see at left (there were buildings there once— I swear) and then is seemingly surprised when very people he has enabled to move into north Brooklyn (who will undoubtedly inhabit the edifice to the right) have the temerity to complain.

From The New York Shitty Inbox, Part II: Signs of Life at The Sweater Factory Lofts?

December 28, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

The tipster who took the above photograph writes:

Open? Vacate notices removed and door propped open. There’s even someone shoveling sidewalk out front.

New York Shitty “glass half full” analysis:

At least they are cleaning the sidewalk.

New York Shitty “glass half empty” analysis:

There is still a Vacate Order on this property.

Whoops.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: Turn Out The Lights

(Or, 239 Banker Street Revisited)

Today on a lark I decided to swing by 239 Banker Street (formerly known as the Sweater Factory Lofts) to see what’s shaking. I was not disappointed.

After I shot the above photograph a gaggle of hipsters took notice and stopped. One of them (who I would presume to be their leader) initiated contact:

I’m guessing you broke that glass because the landlord ripped you off?

I turned around, pointed to the plywood gracing the entrance and replied:

Like I would live in a place like this? I don’t think so.

There was a pregnant pause and then my new friend told me about how the former tenants of this building were ordered out of the building, screwed out of their security deposits and so on and so forth. Although I know of all of this already I listened attentively as he gave me the whole run-down. After he concluded his speech out rolled the corker: he was one of the tenants vacated from this building! There is undoubtedly a life lesson to be had here, dear readers. I will leave it to you to ascertain what it is. But I digress.

When this gent finished his tale of woe I brought it to his attention that he and his neighbors were not the only people Max and his funky bunch owe money to:

(Insert punchline here.)

Miss Heather

P.S.: In (somewhat) related news it would appear that someone has egged the entrance to the Pencil Factory Lofts.

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