From The New York Shitty Inbox: Something Truly Shitty

August 11, 2012 ·
Filed under: 11222, Dog Shit, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

A fellow we’ll call “G” writes:

Dear Miss Heather,

Love your blog. Is there anyway you would could reblog my blog about my apartment, 110 Green Street. I’d like to inform others not to live here and just how crappy the management is here.

viridianbrooklyn.tumblr.com
If not, no hard feelings. Thanks and keep up the good work.

As it would happen, I myself have had the pleasure of receiving a photo of the above-depicted bit of gastronomic distress.

Here it is. The taker of this photograph opines:

Here’s one for your blog. This tasty display of canine explosive diarrhea was discovered in the “lounge” of the Viridian. I’m guessing by the presence of the “Caution!” sign that the dog’s owner has no plans to clean it up. But that’s just the kind of considerate behavior that I’ve come to expect from my neighbors.

Here’s another pair of photos this individual has see fit to send yours truly. Along with commentary.

Check it out… This is the hallway window on my floor. It is hanging out of the wall. (See next picture)

This shows the separation between the window and the wall. The area showing the view across the street is completely open to the outside.

It should be noted this person also informed me that following the fireworks/beer tossing incident on July 4th (which resulted in a police helicopter buzzing the area and generally scaring the bejezzus out of folks), the management of this building issued a memo informing tenants of the rules regarding use of the roof (as seen at the beginning of this post) and that surveillance cameras were installed so as to catch anyone using it without permission. These were promptly rendered non-functional.

Yes sir, it would appear the Viridian has some rather serious problems. Those of you wishing to have a staycation, have the odd $137.00 to burn and wish to see this shit show firsthand might be interested to know a resident of the Viridian is renting her penthouse apartment via airbnb. Otherwise I recommend checking out “G’s” documentation of the train wreck that is 110 Green Street”. It’s something else.*

UPDATE, August 12,2012: There appears to two websites dedicated to 110 Green Street. Behold, Viridian Gripes! I for one found the latest poll rather illuminating.

*Not to suggest I am surprised that the “quality” of construction at this luxury building has become an issue.

I’m not.

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Old & New

October 23, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

From Green Street.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Props & Bicycle Theft At The Viridian

A very nice chap (and Viridian resident), Michael, writes:

Hey Miss Heather,

Avid reader, first time tipper. First I gotta say I love the blog – really great stuff. Indispensable if you live in GP. And congrats on the NY Mag article!

I wanted to write you b/c my 2 bikes were stolen from the Viridian garage (110 Green Street) yesterday (I think). They were last seen on Thursday at 11:30pm and were gone this morning around noon. The 2 bikes were: 1) 1980’s Schwinn World Sport – blue frame with black handle bars, fixed and 2) 1980’s Windsor Carrera Sport – gray frame with red handlebars. I’m really bummed about them being stolen… Maybe you or one of your readers will see them around town. If you do please let me know! Thanks again and keep on rockin!

First off, thanks for the incredibly nice words Michael. They are greatly appreciated! You might be interested to know I will be featured on L Magazine’s web site this upcoming week— so keep an eye out! Otherwise, if anyone has seen a bicycle fitting either of the above descriptions please contact Michael via email at: michael (dot) auerbach (at) gmail (dot) com.

Thanks!

UPDATE, October 3, 2010: Michael has gotten one of his bikes back! He writes:

I got 1 back! Saw some dude with the Windsor on green. Said he found it on the end of Huron street and he gave I back to me! Still missing the Schwinn tho! I hope we can get it back!!!

Miss Heather

LAST GASP: Sunset

September 3, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 


This is not just another set of sunset photos, dear readers. Rather, it is the completion of an assignment I had assigned myself: take an attractive photograph of the Viridian. With a little help from mother nature tonight I am proud to check off  mission accomplished!

Miss Heather

A Green Street PSA: Please

Given this building is located next door to Greenpoint’s pride and joy, The Viridian, methinks it takes very little deduction to figure out yo whom this missive is directed. In light of the fact some Viridian residents saw fit to use the indoor garden used as a doggie dumping ground I wouldn’t bet against it anyway.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: A Dispatch From The Viridian

Yesterday, dear readers, a very special item arrived in yours trulys inbox: an email from a person who lives in none other than the Viridian! I always thought the outside was pretty damned bad. If the following is any indication, the interior isn’t any better.

Anonymous writes:

This blog post writes itself… This is the sign on the ‘tranquility pool’ thing that became a garden.  And this sign showed up a few days after they finished with the garden.
Maybe it should’ve started with ‘Listen up you nasty ingrates.’

(nothing else needs to be said)

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Starter: Magic’s Touch

March 1, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

When I found this book at the junk shop last weekend I could help but take it to Green Street. A place that was and continues to be “touched” by Magic’s touch. The Viridian (or as I prefer to call it: The Green Street Dorms) continues to amuse. The window treatments at this edifice are particularly provocative. There are not very and as a result I have some insight into the lifestyles of 110 Green Street. A bra-clad woman sitting in a director’s chair here, a bedroom with two sets of bunk beds there; every evening the windows glow with plasma television goodness. I do not want to see these things— but I do. Whatever happened to privacy?

Well, here’s one solution to the problem. But back to Magic and his touch.

Mr. Johnson and his funky bunch have touched Greenpoint…

and some intrepid Garden Spotter has seen fit to return the favor.

Miss Heather

Viridian Death Watch: Another One Bites The Dust

September 8, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11222, Abjectecture, Asshole, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

sidewalk

Remember a couple of weeks ago when Jay Lombard of Dog Habitat brought the above little fella (and two of his equally deceased feathered friends) to our attention? He had ascertained that the glass windows of Greenpoint’s favorite nondo, the Viridian, was to blame for their demise; the reflection cast from them was fooling these cedar waxwings— which should be noted are currently migrating south— to fly into them. Well, it is with heavy heart that I inform you 110 Green Street has claimed another victim.

RIP

And this time— instead of picking his (or her) fragile little body up— Magic’s funky bunch simply swept him along with all the other “trash” (gracing the western end of their property) onto their neighbor’s lot.

108green

You’re a real class act, Viridian.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Happy May Day From The Viridian

May 1, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

viridian5109

This post is dedicated to the workers busy readying the Viridian for habitation today.

worker

All one of you.

yourcondo1

As you can see your creation has gained a measure recognition from the community. Albeit in a semantically flawed manner: your ugly building is, in fact, rental property.

yourcondoisugly2

Then again, if it wasn’t so ugly (and over-priced, for that matter) it may very well still be a condominium.

yourcondoisugly3

I suppose it really doesn’t matter anymore. But if I may make a suggestion…

viridianentrance

running a two by four through the door handles of your building isn’t exactly going to lure prospective tenants.

Miss Heather

The Color Of Living Well

April 7, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

(Or: Reader Request Of The Week)

thecoloroflivingwell

On Friday, April 3, 2009 Richard wrote:

I saw your blog covering all the crappy new construction going up in the city.  Could you do a follow-up post with photos that really indicate how poorly these buildings are constructed?  I want to see dented garage doors, rust, light fixtures falling off of buildings constructed within the last 10 years.  I am no longer local to NYC but I am scavenging the internet in an attempt to gather these kind of images for a project I am working on.

Thanks

I’ll be perfectly frank: ordinarily I bristle at this kind of request. I am the editrix of New York Shitty and in that capacity I determine what gets published and when. What’s more, I am lazy. However when one lives in close proximity to Greenpoint’s favorite “nondo”, The Viridian, finding suitable material for this gentleman’s project is easy enough. Hell, I can knock that out while grabbing a gallon of milk.

viridiankitprof

First off, even I have to grudgingly concede that Magic Johnson’s funky bunch have done a pretty decent job of making the facade of this building look like it was professionally built and not knocked out by Travis the Chimp. I strongly suspect the fact that I have made light of the lack of quality workmanship on this colossus on more than one occasion probably has something to do with this development. I also imagine one (or two) of their more astute marketing professionals finally deduced that having haphazard hunks of sheet metal hanging in plain view of interested clients coming and going from their sales office may not be conducive to drumming up business. I hope whoever had this startling revelation was compensated generously for his (or her) efforts. But I digress.

Although the front end of the Viridian is looking by all accounts okay (or at least as palatable as possible) nowadays I regret to inform my new friend Richard that the “back end” of this structure (located on Huron Street), well, looks like ass.

110greenstrear

The above photograph does not do this craptastic craftsmanship justice. Therefore I decided to shoot a little live footage. Enjoy!

Thank you Richard for putting the fire under my ass to follow-up on my affection for poorly constructed crap. Not only do I think this specimen will “jibe” wonderfully with your project but it gave me some much-needed amusement. How did this come to pass, you ask? Very simple: they’re asking $2,900 a month rent for a two bedroom in this turd.

Ha.

Ha.

Ha.

Miss Heather

Photo Credit: Frontal shot of the Viridian comes courtesy of Kitchen Prof.

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