Williamsburg Recession Watch: Yes He Can!

June 16, 2009 ·
Filed under: Recession, Williamsburg 

Much has been made about the recession— namely how to generate employment opportunities for the numerous unfortunate folks who have lost their jobs. Some have proposed the government create a W.P.A.esque entity to get people back to work. Others advocate job training. And today I learned that someone in Williamsburg— in the true rugged individualist tradition of pulling one up by one’s own bootstraps— has taken matters into his own hands by diversifying his marketable skill set. Albeit at the possible expense of his dignity.

illdoitNYS

Any and all in need of a kitty mortician, honey dipper and/or boyfriend-for-hire this is your man. This brash new entrepreneur in a brave new economy also purports to cook, clean, do laundry and assemble bookshelves. In an uncertain world where you can count on no one to fish that errant turd out of your tank or lay you dead pet to rest I find this man’s moxie curiously refreshing. When everyone tells you Hell no— I won’t!, he’ll say:

Yes I can!

For a fee. This is America after all.

As you can see all the tabs on this advertisement have been taken— and very enthusiastically at that. It’s anyone’s guess whether this missive has secured this gent anything in the way of gainful employment— but I’d wager it has probably netted him more than a few marriage proposals!

Miss Heather

Today’s Bit Of Recession Humor: Pulling The Plug

June 8, 2009 ·
Filed under: Recession, Williamsburg 

mishacalvertI usually do not re-blog material from other sites but I have been deluged with emails regarding this gem, an article from the New York Times entitled (in every conceivable sense of the word) “Parents Pulling The Plug on Williamsburg Trustfunders”. For this reason I feel compelled to pass it along. It even features a quote from Misha Calvert (better known as the organizer of the Mr. and Miss Williamsburg Contest and alleged thief of Colt 45) as seen at left.

Interested parties will be pleased (or distressed) to know Ms. Calvert is wearing substantially more apparel in this tome which my buddy over at Queens Crap called:

Quite possibly the most humorous article of the year.

With such pissers as this:

Luis Illades, an owner of the Urban Rustic Market and Cafe on North 12th Street, said he had seen a steady number of applicants, in their late 20s, who had never held paid jobs: They were interns at a modeling agency, for example, or worked at a college radio station. In some cases, applicants have stormed out of the market after hearing the job requirements.

“They say, ‘You want me to work eight hours?’ ” Mr. Illades said. “There is a bubble bursting.”

and this:

It can be hard to see the signs of financial troubles in Williamsburg because residents are so loath to show that they had money in the first place. Robert Lanham, author of “The Hipster Handbook,” said in an interview that many newer residents tried to blend in with the area’s gritty history and dressed “half the time like they’re homeless people.”

I am inclined to agree. If you have not checked out this article already I encourage you to do so. It’s something else. In closing I’d like to give this piece of advice to Ms. Calvert: if you want to be taken seriously it might be good, for starters, not to be photographed in a gold lame bikini top throwing hand signs.

Just a thought.

Miss Heather

Image Credit: Your Nabe via Free Williamsburg

East Williamsburg Street Art Du Jour: Fresh Bricks

June 8, 2009 ·
Filed under: Recession, Street Art, Williamsburg 

freshbricksnys

This missive hails from Skillman Avenue and is located, amusingly enough, on a rather large, ramshackle construction fence. As you will see in the following close-up one very angry citizen (brandishing a bic pen) was even thoughtful enough to add a few finishing touches to Timothy Geitner.

greenspanandfriend

Nice.

Miss Heather

Williamsburg Photos Du Jour: Signs Of The Times

June 3, 2009 ·
Filed under: Recession, Williamsburg 

survivalfair

Metropolitan Avenue

keepcalm

Bedford Avenue

donations

North 9 Street

Miss Heather

Williamsburg Video Du Jour: It’s The Economy, Stupid!

June 2, 2009 ·
Filed under: Crazy People, Recession, Williamsburg 

Summer has arrived in north Brooklyn and with it Bedford Avenue’s favorite mad man has resumed plying his trade. Namely ranting and raving about the various and sundry things which aggrieve him in the middle of the street. Much to the edification, amusement and confusion of passersby. Today’s topic (as I could best ascertain) was the economy. Enjoy!

If President Obama is reading this mark my following five words: give this man a job!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Recession Watch: Yet Another One Bites The Dust

May 29, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Recession 

wandg1

wansg2

forrent1

In news of the hardly surprising variety (as I imagine the market for high end furnishings is next to nonexistent in Greenpoint nowadays— if indeed it ever existed at all) Green & West Furniture, which opened last autumn at 190 West Street, has closed shop.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: Another One Bites The Dust

May 23, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Recession 

gee

sunshine

marias

forrent

cashonly

forrent2

polska

7thheaven

From Manhattan Avenue.

Miss Heather

Williamsburg Street Art Du Jour: Northside Selection

May 16, 2009 ·
Filed under: Recession, Street Art, Williamsburg 

ocean-breezenys

Wythe Avenue

i-wanted

keith-hernandeznys

Berry Street

Miss Heather

A Very Special Stimulus Package

May 9, 2009 ·
Filed under: Area 51, Recession 

Last night I finally got around to having dinner with my good friend Chin. Once we got done with catching up she brought a very special discovery to my attention. And although it really has nothing to do with the usual content of this blog I am going to share it with you anyway. One day she wondered to herself if anyone had seen fit to make a Real Doll that looks like Six from Battlestar Galactica. For those of you who are not in the know, Real Dolls are a very high end and (as the name indicates) realistic looking , a-hem, sexual partners whose cost run into four figures. To make a long story short she discovered these tough times have impacted the mail-order companionship business so the folks at Real Doll have rolled out a very special stimulus package of their own.

stimuluspackage

Not only do these bad boys (or would that be girls?) come with free shipping but they’re entirely made in the good ol’  U.S. of A.! Now there’s a bail-out package we can all really get behind.

Figuratively speaking.

Miss Heather

East Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: 249 Varet Street Revisited*

April 14, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Recession, Williamsburg 

nylofthostel

Per their web site:

Free Internet, parking, computer use, cable TV, Long Distance Calling… our guests are spoiled…

Indeed.

The store bought stencil-tising certainly looks luxurious. I’ve seen halfway houses more welcoming than this. In any case give me a call when this heap is legal— or you have adequately paid off the proper authorities. Whichever comes first.

Miss Heather

*See this and this.

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