Greenpoint
Lorven Pharmacy
Culture on the Cheap
New York Shitty Day Ender: Street Seat
You can always leave it to 106 Green Street (which is located immediately next door to the Viridian) to keep things real in the Garden Spot. In the case of the above photograph we have a stand pipe which reads:
Asshole Pick up your Dog Shit
an assortment of detritus and a toilet seat that is a lot worse for wear.
Have a nice day!
Miss Heather
Greenpoint Video Du Jour: Dark Side Of The Moon
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
True to form things were pretty quiet yesterday, Good Friday, here at the 11222. The college students (who I presume to be on “break”) have all gone out of town. If Greenpoint had tumbleweeds they would indeed be blowing across our streets.
The only activity of note has been at the sausage shops. Their clientele (in search of a quality kielbasa to celebrate the resurrection of our lord) formed queues which overflowed onto the sidewalks. But this is nothing unusual. In fact, I’d be more worried if I did not see a large number of sausage enthusiasts peppering our fine burgh’s sidewalks this holiday weekend. Although I am a vegetarian I find their presence strangely comforting: they are proof-positive that the unique character of my neighborhood has not been eradicated. Yet.
Good Friday in Greenpoint means different things to different people. A trip back home to be with loved ones for some, a wait at the sausage shop for others. For me it’s just business as usual. To someone else it meant parking his (or her) car in front of Papasitos, putting their theft deterrent gear in place (in this case, “The Club”), popping open the trunk, rolling down the windows and cranking Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of the Moon” for everyone’s edification. What’s more interesting is no one seemed to mind…
except for my buddy Larry da Junkman. He told me in an exasperated tone that this had been going on (and off) for several hours. I’m guessing he’s not a big Pink Floyd fan. I myself would have preferred “The Wall”.
Hello, hello, hello. Is there anybody in there?
Miss Heather
Sidney Lumet Watch: Lifetime Achievement Follow-up
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Some of you might remember that last month my good friend Rebecca11222 found a Lifetime Achievement Award (as seen at left) issued to none other than Sidney “Serpico” Lumet from the Savannah College of Art & Design in a patch of Greenpoint shrubbery. If you haven’t you can read about it here, here and here. Well, Mr. Lumet hasn’t stepped forward to claim it yet (and as a result this item currently calls a skeleton wearing a lei as a neighbor) but this most unusual turn of events has not gone unnoticed by a reporter for SCAD’s student newspaper, District. Tandy Versyp writes:
…Rebecca Poole, a stage actor and teacher of the Alexander Technique, was walking her dog, a shih tzu named Fred Sanford in the Brooklyn neighborhood of Greenpoint when she noticed the award hidden in a row of bushes next to the sidewalk.
Just rescued my dog from a junkyard that’s where he got his name, Poole laughed. So I watch everything he does when I take him out. He was sniffing something at this three-point intersection and was about to pee on it, when I saw it. My first thought was, “What the hell?”…
What the hell, indeed. To read the rest of this article click here. Do give it a read. It is tremendously entertaining.
Miss Heather
East Village Photos Du Jour: Gearing Up For Easter
From De Robertis Pasticceria, 1st Avenue.
Miss Heather
Crosstown Local Photo Du Jour: It’s BAAAACK!
April 11, 2009
Metropolitan Transit Authority
Attn: H. Dale Hemmerdinger, Chairman
347 Madison Avenue
New York, NY 10017-3739
Re: advertisement on Queens-bound platform at Greenpoint Avenue
Dear Mr. Hemmerdinger,
What did my community ever do to you to deserve this? I mean, I can handle the odd pervert whipping out his penis— but hammertoes too? Have a heart, Dale. Please.
Sincerely,
Miss Heather
Proprietress of New York Shitty, Greenpoint citizen & patron of the Crosstown Local
New York Shitty Day Ender: Adoption Event & Benefit
Tomorrow, April 11, the folks at Empty Cages Collective have not one but two events lined up. Firstly, they will having an adoption event from noon until 5:00 p.m. at NYC Pet Supplies:
241 Bedford Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11211
Later that evening there will be a benefit at the Rockstar Bar featuring Nathan Carpenter, Morgan O’Cane, Sturgeon, Zhenia Golov, Hipster Holocaust, and DJ Marvelous Hagler with proceeds going to Empty Cages Collective. Doors open at 9:00 p.m. and admission will be determined on a “sliding scale” (think anywhere between $5.00 – $10.00— either way that’s pretty cheap!).
Empty Cages Collective Benefit
April 11, 2009 starting at 9:00 p.m.
Rockstar Bar
351 Kent Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11211
For more details about either of these events head over to Empty Cage’s web site.
Miss Heather
Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: Collect All 10!
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
From Manhattan Avenue.
Miss Heather
Williamsburg Photos Du Jour: A Sampling Of Street Art
Metropolitan Avenue
North 9 Street
North 10 Street
Bedford Avenue
Kent Avenue
Miss Heather
Greenpoint Fashion Watch: Urban Jungle
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
My neighborhood is known for a number of things. Being the vanguard of fashion is not one of them. This is a shame as I have noticed that although a number of things in my neighborhood have changed, there “look” here has not. As crazy as it may sound the tools of the fashion trade for the ladies in the Garden Spot are not too different than what is to be found in Texas. Black leather mini skirts, stiletto heels, UV ray kissed skin, blue eyeshadow, prominently displayed (and often augmented) breasts and hair (preferably blond, but any day-glo shade of red will suffice in a pinch) coaxed into forms that would make Gaudi proud
are to my fair burgh what the little black dress and a pair of Manolos are to our friends across the East River.
It should be noted that although there is a general disdain amongst Greenpoint gals for the laws of nature there is one thing they all revere: they loves them some leopard print.
Tiger print.
Zebra print.
Dalmation print.
Fake fur.
You name it: if it once prowled the plains of the Serengeti I can assure you it graces the physique of many a lady here in Greenpoint. Enough so that on any given day the not-so-mean streets of my neighborhood look like an outtake from Mutual of Omaha’s Animal Kingdom. To prove my point I recently grabbed my camera and put on my Marlon Perkins thinking cap to capture some of these exotic birds of prey. Follows is slide show of what I found— along with a few oldies but goodies. Enjoy!
This one’s for you ladies of Greenpoint. I for one think you’re beautiful! NOw if you don;t mind I’m off to purchase a gallon of Clairoxide.
Miss Heather
Introducing The “Blighties”
As some of you might have noticed I have spent a considerable amount of bandwidth this week making light of the development-induced blight that plagues north Brooklyn. There are a number of reasons for this, but to give you a short list:
1. Each and every derelict construction site is a testament to what happens when bad policy-making, easy credit and greed meet with farcical enforcement by the agencies deemed to serve the public interest and safety. Yes, I am talking to you Department of Buildings.
2. A great number of these sites were once places of employment for some, homes to others. Now they’re rubbish-infested wastelands.
3. While the intended effort (ostensibly) of the rezoning in north Brooklyn was to improve the quality of life here the actual effect has been quite the opposite. I suppose there have been winners (like people whose budget for rental property exceeds the per capita income for a family of four here— the last time I checked Greenpoint was hovering around $30,000 a year), but this community as a whole is not one of them. We will shouldering the consequences of their malfeasance for a very, VERY long time.
4. I have seen my quality of life substantially degraded in the last 2-3 years as a result of points #1 and #2.
Suffice it to say I have become a bit of a connoisseur of development-induced crap heaps over the years. And for this reason I have elected 218 North 9 Street to receive New York Shitty’s first ever Blighty award. What does it take to get a “Blighty” you ask? Well, I haven’t determined the criteria just yet but this site will be used as a benchmark!
Three indicators of a good piece of developer blight can be seen in the above photograph:
- A for sale/for rent sign on an adjacent property.
- Lots of concertina wire.
- Plenty of graffiti and street art on the fence.
Not to suggest the latter most point is a negative. I think this bunny is cute.
This pile of garbage not so much.
Oh look, part of the fence is down! Let’s see what’s inside!
A pile of rubbish, a busted up toilet…
AND MORE RUBBISH!
Congratulations 218 North 9 Street on receiving the first, but certainly not last, New York Shitty Blightie Award! Given the tough times we’re in nowadays— and all the developer blight that has come with it— methinks I will have to ask my good friend Hard Hat Hannah to come out of retirement and lend me a hand.
To be continued.
Miss Heather
NYS Flickr Pool
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