Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: Kindness Counts

August 19, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11222, Dog Shit Signage, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

It’s been a while since I have hit you up with some blue chip dog shit signage. Well, as it happened today I encountered quite a bounty whilest strolling down Greenpoint’s less-than-gold coast. Here they are.

Calyer Street


I find this one fascinating on a purely semiotic level. You have a dog shit sign made out of a photograph featuring yet another dog shit sign. It’s like an M.C. Escher paintingalbeit one about crap.


Courtesy coupled with Orwellian overtones… I like it!

West Street



Over the years I have become quite the aficionado of this person’s work. He or she has been at for quite some time and although the copy varies a little, e.g.; the reader is usually addressed as “asshole”. The author always goes to the trouble to say thanks. Here’s a pair but goodies from the New York Shitty archives.


This one dates from March of this year. As you can see our dog shit vigilante exercises a great deal of resourcefulness when it comes to getting his (or her) message across. And in closing there is the following one, my personal favorite, which dates from April of 2006.


Who can argue with that?

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: Has Anyone Seen Tiger Lily?

August 14, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11222, Crazy Cat Lady, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 


If you have seen Miss Lily or know of her whereabouts please contact her “person” at the above telephone number ASAP. As the above flier indicates she has a purple collar and health problems which require medication. Suffice it to say time is definitely of the essence!

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Starter: The United Colors Of Greenpoint

August 11, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Vinyl Siding 


Every so often I like to create assignments for myself. This, my latest one, came the way they usually do: via a flight of fancy. One day I wondered to myself if Greenpoint, the Garden Spot of the Universe— and patron par excellence to the aluminum siding industry— sported a rainbow assortment of siding products. What you have just seen, dear readers, is the result of one month’s worth of research. There is only one conclusion that can be drawn from the copious amount photographic evidence/data I have collected: yes!

Miss Heather

Williamspoint Photos Du Jour: Summer In The Shitty


Huron Street


Manhattan Avenue


North 7 Street


Driggs Avenue


Bedford Avenue



Calyer Street


Java Street

Miss Heather

Reader Comment Of The Week

June 16, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

heroinYes I know it’s only Tuesday but I seriously doubt (hope? pray?) Ihave to moderate a comment of this caliber for the next five days. After all, It’s not every day you:

  • ask the police what you can do about drug activity in your apartment building only to be told it is “a tenant landlord matter”
  • have a friend of your landlady’s son, an alleged drug dealer, die in the basement of your apartment building…
  • and there his body remained for over 12 hours

Then again this is the 94th Precinct we’re talking about. Nothing— no matter how crass— surprises me anymore. Even so, I have to confess this is one very special story. Rebecca11222 writes (in regards to this post):

Hi, Laura – My 2 cents as to who to also contact at this point: The NYC Parks Department.  In McCarren and McGolrick Parks there is a Manager on site.  I can say that the fellow at McCarren is very helpful.

I guess the question to have answered is: do they have a Manager on site at the new park?  Find out the name & what his/her hours are.  My bet is that weekend availability is patchwork. Report the incident and ask what they advise if you are in that situation again.

My concern is the threats of violence (albeit alcohol-fueled) with which you & your family were met.  I’m sorry that happened and when calling the 94th, I’ve found to place the emphasis on behavior that they can either get arrests out of or at least big $.  Like “driving while intoxicated” or ” behaving violently around children”  You’d think that a nice steep fine for littering would be incentive; but I guess not.

Personally, I live in a building w/ a junkie/ low-level drug-dealer in the basement.  He is the landlady’s son.  People who fall asleep standing up around the nabe are his only friends.  I see deals going down around my apt building  (Calyer at Eckford) frequently.  All my neighbors (some of whom have lived in Greenpoint for over 50 years) have seen him make deals around the blocks and in front of the house.  Yet she is in denial about his habit and he manipulates her.  When we first moved in, we found used syringes an glass vials in the fireplace ashes.  The son had been living in our apt before we moved in. When we brought this to her attention, our landlady said “this is a drug-free house.”

My husband & I asked some 94th officers what we could do b/c people who do heroin or crack tend to steal or fall asleep w/ lit cigarettes (or become violent in the case of crack).  They said it was a landlord tenant dispute until “something” happened.

Well, early this Friday morning, one of the son’s “friends” died in the basement.  The landlady told me, “my son wanted to move the body & dump it somewhere else, but I said he couldn’t.” She attributed his desire to move said body to a desire to protect her rather than, oh, say, hide some evidence.  The body stayed there until about 8pm Friday & there was a cop posted outside the building.  I wonder if this will be enough of a “something” to warrant further police investigation or action.  Or maybe someone else has to die.

Btw: if anyone wants 2 awesome, quiet, responsible tenants, my husband & I are looking for a new place.

So there have you.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Another Fine Mess

June 3, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 


From Calyer Street.

Miss Heather

SCADGate: The Conclusion

May 13, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

scadthumbThis morning I was reminded that all good things— even a curious case of a lifetime achievement award in inexplicably found in traffic triangle in Greenpoint— must come to end. Rebecca11222 writes:

Well, a pall hangs over the apartment today: the SCAD Lifetime Achievement Award has been returned to it’s rightful owner: Sidney Lumet’s publicist.

The kind people at SCAD and the Savannah Film Festival arranged for postage and packing materials. I just wrapped it & then dropped it off at FedEx.

I received some awesome SCAD booty (travel cup & tee-shirt) for my trouble. AND an offer from the director of the SFF to host me in Savannah should I like to visit.  But the apartment feels empty, somehow.

See attached for photo of Sanford with the travel cup.


I suspect I speak for everyone (except perhaps Sanford, who appears to be less than impressed with the reward reaped by his owner’s good deed) to learn this story has a happy ending. If that award could talk I imagine it would have an interesting tale to tell. But alas, it is keeping its silence and we will have to be content with the whiff of serendipity it brought our lives. Bon voyage, prodigal lifetime achievement award! I hope you enjoyed your stay in the Garden Spot of the Universe.

Miss Heather

Found In Greenpoint: Lifetime Achievement Award

March 24, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Rebecca11222 (who contributed the following bit of Greenpoint goodness) writes (in an email entitled Found in the shrubbery at the triangle intersection of Calyer, Banker, Franklin):



If you are reading out there, Sidney 12 Angry Men /Serpico* Lumet**, Rebecca11222 has retrieved your Lifetime Achievement Award from the Savannah College of Art and Design (and a certain fate of being pissed, vomited and shat upon by creatures two, three and four legged alike***— there’s no accounting for taste in this town). It resides in the cozy comfort in her apartment and she will be more than happy to return it to you. Totally free of cost.

Sidney Lumet, STAND UP PLEASE.

Miss Heather

*Who some may recall was sent to the North Brooklyn Narcotics Unit and shot in the head at this apartment building on the Southside.

**And Dog Day Afternoon! ATTICA! ATTICA!

***Or used to prop up a window air conditioning unit.

Greenpoint Pay Phones Du Jour: Off The Hook

March 10, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 



From Calyer Street.

Miss Heather

Williamspoint Photos Du Jour: Wheels

February 13, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

Presented for your Friday afternoon entertainment: a selection of wheels from the Garden Spot and beyond. Enjoy!


This Fred T. Sanford special hails from Calyer Street.


If this gent’s defensive driving skills are anything like his ability to parallel park it would certainly explain all the “boo boos” gracing his ride.



I pity the fool who is paying $1,500+ a month for this studio apartment!


North 12th Street goes south of the border.



Some food for thought from Manhattan Avenue.


Everthing is coming up roses on Noble Street.





Thames Street prefers hogs.


Greenpoint gangstas prefer Volkswagens. Lest you are wondering a solitary rose was gracing its bud vase— even tough guys like flowers!

Miss Heather

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