East Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: 249 Varet Street Revisited*

April 14, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Recession, Williamsburg 

nylofthostel

Per their web site:

Free Internet, parking, computer use, cable TV, Long Distance Calling… our guests are spoiled…

Indeed.

The store bought stencil-tising certainly looks luxurious. I’ve seen halfway houses more welcoming than this. In any case give me a call when this heap is legal— or you have adequately paid off the proper authorities. Whichever comes first.

Miss Heather

*See this and this.

New York Shitty Day Ender: East Williamsburg Naughahyde

April 13, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Street Art, Williamsburg 

stagg-street-couch

This forlorn example of two-tone vinyl employed for a most stylish effect hails from Stagg Street just east of Stewart Avenue.

Miss Heather

Fun With Rock Photography in New York City

April 13, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

(Or: Don’t F**K With The DOS’s Boulder)

dosrock

It could be argued that the only thing I like more than getting a good mind fuck is administering one. You know what they say: it is much better to give than to receive. Today I arose to a beautiful day and after catching myself staring wistfully out my living room window one too many times I decided to table the blog and go for a walk. A long walk. On days such as this I long to get a little taste of spring time— albeit not in the manner many of my fellow New Yorkers do. When they head to the park or take a nice stroll along the waterfront I pay a visit to the hinterlands of north Brooklyn Industrialville. To bastardize my buddy Brando Robert Duvall* from Apocalypse Now:

I love the smell of PCBs in the morning.

Which brings me to the not-so-small rock gracing the beginning of this post and the subject of mind fucks. I found this item on Gardiner Avenue just north of Varick Street. For those of you who are not in the know this rock is located on a rather sizable plot of land owned by the Department of Sanitation. This facility is patrolled by a security guard who I had the pleasure of meeting. He was your average Joe with a job to do; in this case, preventing people (ostensibly terrorists) from photographing their installation. Our conversation started as follows:

You can’t photograph that.

He said. To wit I replied:

I’m not going to argue with you, but could you tell me why this rock is painted green?

“That rock belongs to the Department of Sanitation” he said “and they do not want anyone taking photographs of their facility”.

Understood.

I said. “Believe you me the last place I want to hang out at on a pretty day like this is a waste transfer facility on Whale Creek. I simply like to photograph oddities. Take that truck down the street, for example…

bettybooptruck

…I’ve found Betty Boop on more things than you can possibly imagine. Just a couple weeks ago a found a refrigerator covered in Betty Boop stickers. I took a photograph of that too. As for that rock, well, I suppose it makes sense that the Department of Sanitation would paint it green. As you said, it is their rock and they can do with it whatever they wish. There are a lot of big rocks in this area. Many of them are painted and I have taken photographs of a number of them. There’s one at the intersection George Street and Evergreen Avenue someone has clad in plaid.

plaidrock

I really like that one.”

sandgravel

There’s also a rather nice boulder at the corner of Vandervoort Avenue and Division Place. It advertises sand and gravel for sale. A pretty witty selling tool if you ask me.

therock

Then of course there’s the rock at Morgan Avenue and Rock Street.

bigassrockgone

That one has since been removed. Why I don’t know. Some people thought it was ugly but I rather liked it.

And then you have Arbitration Rock. Haven’t seen that one yet but I plan to!

It was at this point my new friend smiled. I suspect his years of experience informed him that a daft 30-something broad clad in pink pants, pink shoes, pink shirt, pink jacket and pink hair held at bay with an aqua blue bandanna (I lost my pink one a month ago) babbling about North Brooklyn’s boulders did not constitute a security breach. At least not one worth contacting the authorities about. Long story made short he relented and let me take a photograph of the Department of Sanitation’s rock.

Whoever you are security dude I will be eternally grateful to your generosity for allowing me to add this big boy to my collection. Thanks!

Miss Heather

*See comments.

Happy Easter From New York Shitty!

April 12, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

mccarrenbunny

Mister Heather took this great photograph of a not-so-rascally rabbit getting a little play time in McCarren Park recently. Follows is a slide show I compiled of some shots I took in the greater 11222 area to celebrate this Easter Sunday. Enjoy!

Get off the computer already and enjoy the sunshine!

Miss Heather

Willamspoint Photos Du Jour: People In My Neighborhood

April 9, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

foursome

coolthing

rosemarys

Bedford Avenue

tourists

Metropolitan Avenue

cooldudeongrand

Grand Street

americanplayground1

theroundtable

Franklin Street

nattydresser

Kent Avenue

cooperpark

Maspeth Avenue

footlong

Manhattan Avenue

Miss Heather

Williamspoint Video Du Jour: Slow Down

April 8, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

slowdown

On April 6, 2009 my buddy down at Brooklyn11211 wrote (in regards to this post):

What is more wacky is why there is a sign for the Brooklyn Battery Tunnel on Metropolitan Avenue in Williamsburg.

To wit I replied:

It’s your ‘hood, dude— you tell me!

Which brings me to the above bit of signage. It is one of several such signs that some rugged individualist has seen fit to erect on Maspeth Avenue across the street from Cooper Park (which I should add is firmly located in the 11211 zip code). While the provenance of these signs is unknown the people I spoke to on this block agreed that “crazy drivers” deemed them necessary. What I wanted to know is if they work. So I took a leisurely stroll down the block to find out.

I suspect anyone who is reading this post and has the pleasure of interfacing with 311 (it’s a hit or miss affair— some operators are better than others) will agree that filing complaints in this manner seems to be a futile endeavor. This has often been my experience, anyway. But dial them anyway, take down the complaint number and forward it to your community board. Yes, this will entail some work on your part, dear readers, but I suspect we can all agree that one person— much less a child— hit by a speeding car is one too many.

Miss Heather

Dog Doo Signs Du Jour: For The Love Of Big Brother

April 7, 2009 ·
Filed under: Brooklyn, Williamsburg 

wearewatchingyou

wearewatchingyou2

keepnyclean

This winsome trio hails from none other than Maujer Street in East Williamsburg. Granted, the latter most does not purport to be “watching you” but it has a certain menacing quality I found noteworthy. Whoever crafted this sign not only took a great deal of time to scallop the edges (nice touch) but he (or she) also appears to be unaware that driving six nails and screws into a tree is probably as unhealthy— if not more s0— than getting showers of the golden variety from the local canines.

Speaking of unhealthy, I am going to close this post with one of the most hardcore dog doo deterrents I have ever beheld. It hails from Washington Avenue, 11238.

washingtonave

They raise ’em tough in Prospect Heights.

washingtonavetreepit

Damn.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: Al Fresco Living

April 6, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Street Furniture, Williamsburg 

driggsavenuemattress

noparking

kitchenettewithsiding

futon

Driggs Avenue

decanters

Maspeth Avenue

fridge

South 1st Street

cot

Ainslie Street

legs

Metropolitan Avenue

Miss Heather



New & Noteworthy: Pink Crack Kills

April 6, 2009 ·
Filed under: Advanced Life Forms, Bushwick 

pinkcrackkillsrayliotta

I have long been of the opinion that the very special place that is Bushwick is sorely under-represented in the Brooklyn blogosphere. Needless to say when I received the following email I was tickled pink to learn the good news about Pink Crack Kills:

I like your blog about shit. I know that you stray to other topics, which is important, but the underlying thread that really makes the posts a part of a bigger whole is shit, and that’s good. I too, have a blog that deals with Brooklyn’s unsanitary side. It’s really the web presence for a zine that I, along with a few friends, publish a few times a year, but one of our favorite topics is used condoms on the streets of NYC. The vast majority of these come from Bushwick because I live there and I’m pretty sure we have more used condoms per capita than any other neighborhood in the 5 boroughs. My eyes however, are always open and my camera always ready, so Williamsburg and the ever-elusive Manhattan street condom show up whenever I see them… So I guess what I’m trying to say is check us out.

Jonathan W. Smith, C.E.O. pinkcrackkills.com

Check them out I did. Not only did I find some of the promised used prophylactics but gems such as the photograph gracing the beginning of this post were also awaiting my delectation. Congratulations Bushwick, you have finally gotten the web presence you so richly deserve. Check it out!

Miss Heather

East Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: Cell Phone Booth

April 2, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Williamsburg 

cellphonebooth

From Seigel Street.

Miss Heather

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