Christmas With Q

(Or: Drinking On Duty)

Last night a good friend of mine— one who I do not see as often as I’d like to— came over for Christmas dinner. The reason I do not see her much is she is a bartender and as a result keeps “vampire hours”. Nonetheless my friend, who we will call “Q”, usually has a host of work stories to share when we do see each other. Some of them are very funny, some of them are not. Which brings me to the subject of this post: as we supped and were getting caught up the subject of the 94th Precinct arose. I found what she had to recount downright disturbing.

Q recounted to me numerous occasions when those who ostensibly protect and serve us would drop by her place of employment seeking something to drink. In uniform. On duty. When one such public servant requested a margarita Q felt compelled to point the beverage in question had alcohol in it. To wit he replied:

A margarita has alcohol in it?

The last time I checked they do. Or should. In any case I can personally attest that my buddy Q makes ’em strong!

Another time Q overheard one officer say to another:

What if (excised— supervisor) smells this on my breath?

Inasmuch as I understand it this issue was quickly resolved and they proceeded to imbibe. As you can imagine my friend does not feel very comfortable being asked by officers on duty to serve them alcoholic beverages. Can you blame her? After all, we are talking about a group of men and women who have to think on their feet and let us not forget: bear firearms. But as the evening wound down I came away with the distinct impression drinking on duty is a fairly common practice.

Why don’t they go to the Turkey’s Nest? Everyone knows they’ll give you drinks to go. That’s where the police go.

Q mused. This is a very good question. Perhaps someone should posit it to our new Commanding Officer?

Miss Heather

Now At McCarren Park: Indecent Exposure

checkin it out and whippin it outI feel compelled to bring this item (which was taken November 22nd by Miss Mousey Brown) to my fellow Greenburgers’s attention. She writes:

This young man is not a public urinator. He is an exhibitionist or public self- pleasurer. This was a little before school let out. This person fondled his genitals on top of his jeans for a minute while surveying the landscape of joggers, soccer players , and me. He pulled out his penis for about one minute, displayed it to all of the north-face of Bayard street and then he decided to put “it” away.

Can you imagine what it will be like when the McCarren Park Pool reopens? He’ll feel like a kid in a candy store! In all seriousness, please be on the lookout for this chap— and if you spot him “at work” call 911  STAT! This is gross.

Miss Heather

P.S.: For those of you who are wondering (you know who you are) and identification purposes this chap is purported to be rather well endowed.

Once Again: 94th Precinct Community Council Meeting

September 21, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Remember the item I posted this weekend stating the 94th Precinct’s Community Council monthly meeting was scheduled for September 20, 2010? Well, it was canceled. This month’s meeting will be conducted this evening instead.

94th Precinct Community Council Meeting
September 20 21, 2010 7:30 p.m.
Capital One Bank
(AKA: The Greenpoint Savings Bank)
807 Manhattan Avenue, Calyer Street Entrance
Brooklyn, New York 11222

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Another Party At 66 North 1 Street?

August 22, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11211, Culture War, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

Night before last I could not for the life of me fall— and STAY— asleep. I attribute the latter to our furkid, Jerzy. He has recently decided that the wee hours of the morning are “play time”. All I am going to say it’s a damned good thing the little fella is cute. Sadly , the same cannot be said about the following batch of night owls. M writes:

dear miss heather

thank you for your help last time, i appreciate it. it is 1:47 a.m. and there is another party in the same unrented condo building at 66 North 1st street.  this time people are inside all the unrented apartments, some have red lights on, and there are people on the roof ( last time it was just the courtyard)  i called the police and they said they already had complaints and a car was on the way but they said this last time and nothing happened until 8 am.  i am praying this is not a repeat. 

i went over and the people were not at all friendly and one of them said “this is dumbo” (!!! —Ed. Note) so they are also geographically challenged.  i told them i had called the police and this made them a little nervous but they have not turned the music down.

i have no idea who is throwing the party, but i think it’s a security guard on the take.  i think the developer must not have taken the complaints seriously last time.  the crowd is younger and more mixed this time, including a lot of Hispanic teenagers, a very different crowd than last time.  no boas were spotted.

Now jump forward to this morning. A photograph of said festivities was awaiting my delectation.

Another anonymous tipster writes:

I’m sure people who are buying these condos would love to know people have been partying in them first.

Indeed! I wonder what’s next for this— Williamsburg’s most swingingest nondo— a casino, perhaps? If any of you, dear readers, can think of other more compelling alternative uses for this repurposed piece of residential property please share them via the comments. The best submission will win a (to be determined) prize.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Party At 66 North 1st Street?

August 1, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11211, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

As noted on Brownstoner this property has had a rather troubled history. Nonetheless 66 North 1 Street recently went back on the market— and as of two weeks ago had nine units in contract. If my inbox is any indication, I’d hazard to guess at least one of them has sold.

Anonymous writes (in an email written at 7:24 this morning and is entitled “Al Fresco Dance Party”):

My wife and I and our 16 month old daughter have been kept up all night by a quite clearly illegal dance party hosted in a stalled condo project on North 1st, between kent and wythe I called the police a total of 4 times during the night, and 311 as well. Do you know how to get hold of the details of the owners of buildings like this ? Also, is there anything we can do as members of the community ? Community board meetings or similar? It’s 7.30 and it’s still going on. I’m concerned that if they think the cops are powerless, they will carry on for the rest of the summer. If they do, we’re moving out. Any suggestions you could make would be greatly appreciated.

Um, is that lady wearing a boa? On a Sunday?

Not just one— not just two— but three turntables. This is one professional operation!

He goes on to write:

90th were on the case last night apparently. They sent out cars 3/4 times apparently and just asked them to turn it down (?!?!)… Actually got in touch with the developers.

Anonymous has called the police and contacted the developer of this property. This is a good start. Regrettably the police did not fix the problem and exactly how the developer will respond remains to be seen. I would recommend he follow-up at the next 90th Precinct Community Council meeting. If my memory serves me correctly the 94th (which I am much more familiar with) does not conduct meetings in August. Therefore, I would encourage him to call their Community Affairs Office at: (718) 963 – 5309 and learn when the next meeting is scheduled (I’m guessing September).

Although this is clearly a police matter, attending the next Community Board 1 meeting might also be worth Anonymous’s time. The next combined public hearing/board meeting will be September 15, 2010 starting at 6:30 p.m. (NOTE/CAVEAT: you must sign up to speak by or before 6:00 p.m.). In the meantime CB1 can be contacted via email at:

bk01(at) cb (dot) nyc (dot) gov

Other resources/contacts I’d recommend are:

  1. His local City Councilman, who happens to be Steve Levin. His district office can be reached via telephone at: (718) 875-5200
  2. And of course there is his local state Assemblyman, Joe Lentol. His office can be reached via telephone at (718) 383-7474.
  3. Lastly, Anonymous’s State Assemblyman is Daniel Squadron. His office can be contacted via email at: squadron (at) senate (dot) state (dot) ny (dot) us

This is just a short list. Anyone out there have advice to tender? If so please submit them via comments or email at: missheather (at) thatgreenpointblog (dot) com. Your identity will remain anonymous if you so desire. In closing it goes without saying that Anonymous could contact the neighbors in question. My recommendation would be to wait a few more hours. They’re probably sleeping.

Miss Heather

UPDATE, 6:20 p.m.: An eagle-eyed reader (and I would presume, disgruntled neighbor) writes:

That stupid party at 66 North 1st finally stopped at 9 am. Did you notice the 2 gas cylinders on either side of the DJ table? I wonder if they’re oxygen, acetylene, or maybe nitrous oxide?

I have now! This latest revelation has been a source of serious debate between the Mister and me. He says they’ve been “huffing”. I beg to differ. Being the kind of gal who likes to see the glass gas tank as “half full” I prefer to see these tanks filling balloons for Chelsea Clinton’s wedding reception. Is the barefoot woman in white Hillary? One can only hope so. After all, Willyburg already has one Bill— what’s another one?

Update, 8:40 p.m.: Per a commenter no one lives in this building at all! And so the mystery of the 66 North 1st Street “party” continues. It is also interesting to note a complaint was filed on June 9, 2010 stating this was a derelict construction site. The Department of Building’s inspection (which dates from July 14, 2010) is as follows:


Update, August 2, 2010: and now a word from this building’s PR firm…

I handle the public relations for 66 North1st, and I just saw the recent post on 66 North 1st. Wanted to let you know that it was definitely not a pr/sales stunt and the brokers truly had no idea. This party was held without permission from the owners and without management’s knowledge…

Update, August 3, 2010: it would appear this was the second party thrown at this nondo. A tipster writes:

That was the second of those parties at 66 North 1st. The first was a month or two ago. It was just as loud, but must have ended sometime during the night, because I couldn’t hear it in the morning.

But it was definitely at that location, because I could see the lights in the back yard.

Photo Credits: 66 North 1 Street thumbnail comes courtesy of Brownstoner.

New York Shitty Street Seating Du Jour: Ingenuity

There is genius and then there is GENIUS. This creation (which hails from Spanish Harlem where I went on a photo walk with the immensely talented Steven R. Hazlett today) falls into the latter category.

The elegance of this arrangement is truly stunning: cantilevered seating courtesy of NYPD barricades. Initially these chaps couldn’t understand why I, some dotty 30-something Greenpointer, was so fascinated by their creation. Once I explained respectfully (and made it clear they would not be in the New York Daily News) they had plenty to say.

The gent on the right claimed credit for this creation— and stated that the NYPD gives him plenty of guff about it. He told yours truly they come by regularly and roust him from his “bench”. Because it is their property. He then pointed to a NYPD squad car across the street and exclaimed:

There they are. Can’t you see them hating me?!?

I can’t honestly say I did. See hating. Then again, I suspect the NYPD would refrain from “hating” on these guys while a white chick with a camera is talking to them. In any case, street seating of this caliber demands a serious New York Shitty salute. Here it is. This one’s for you!

Miss Heather

P.S.: I will be rounding out today’s postage with a slide show of highlights from my sojourn in Spanish Harlem. Stay tuned!

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Noise Woes

July 12, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

A person we’ll call N writes:

Hey Heather,

I hate to beat a dead horse, but this problem just won’t go away.  I was up again until 4am because of Coco66’s monthly dub step night.  The 2nd Saturday of every month, Coco’s really loves to just blast that bass until the wee hours of the morning. I called 311 and made a complaint.  The funny thing is, I looked up the status just now (as seen at left — Ed. Note) and it said the Police took action and fixed the problem, which is a most blatant lie.  They didn’t do anything, as I said I was up until 4am.  I’ve also contacted the Community Board twice now, once in May (never to hear a response) and again last week.  At this point I don’t know what’s left for me to do other than move, which I really shouldn’t have to do if the city just upheld it’s own ordinance laws.  Do you have any advice?

Although I have outlined the protocol for this kind of thing numerous times (and despite the fact it appears to not to be working for N so far) here they are again:

1. Contact Community Board 1 and forward all pertinent documentation— including 311 complaint numbers— to them. Their email address is: bk01 (at) cb (dot) nyc (dot) gov

2. Contact Assemblyman Joe Lentol’s Office. This too can be done quickly and easily via email: lentolj (at) assembly (dot) state (dot) ny (dot) ny (dot) us

3. Contact Councilman Steve Levin’s office. His email address is as follows: slevin (at) council (dot) nyc (dot) gov

4. Go to the next 94th Precinct Community Council and make D. I. Fulton aware that the officers under his watch did not resolve the noise problem to your satisfaction. I suspect the next meeting will, unfortunately, be in September. But you should contact them via telephone and confirm this.

5. And in N’s case talk to your neighbors and see if they too are experiencing sleepless nights due to CoCo66’s din. The more people you have following steps #1 through #4 the better!

In closing (and in reference to point #5), has noise from CoCo66 (or CoCo68, for that matter) been a problem for you? If so I’d very much like to hear from you. Please tender you two cents via comments or email at: missheather (at) thatgreenpointblog (dot) com. Your identity will remain anonymous if you so desire. Thanks!

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: An Update Regarding The Mark Bar Raccoon

July 1, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

(Or, make that: raccoons)

I asked for it and I got it: the skinny on what happened at the Mark Bar Tuesday night. K writes:

It’s true:  I first came across a baby raccoon near the Mark Bar late Tuesday night.  It was the size of a kitten, and appeared scared and lost.  I followed, then cornered it as I called 311: there was nothing anyone could do, the responder said; ASPCA was closed till morning.

Then last night there were about a half dozen police officers – and another half dozen onlookers – outside the Mark Bar with a spotlight directed toward the roof; cushions lined the sidewalk.  Sure enough, you could see raccoons scurrying about in a hole near the roof molding.  Apparently two had already fallen (hence the cushions).

I later found out the baby raccoon I tried to save on Tuesday was put to sleep.  So was an adult yesterday.  Another baby was let loose in McCarren Park; a third baby is….. well, living in a cage in the Mark Bar right now.
In addition, bleibtreu has tendered his (her?) two cents via comments. I have taken the liberty of highlighting the passage I found most interesting):

The first good news is that the raccoon didn’t seem to be injured at all. It did lie on the ground not moving for about 90 seconds, then was up and walking. Cooperation between patrons and staff from the Mark Bar and Tommy’s Tavern brought a plastic cat carrier to the scene, and the raccoon was placed inside with the plan for someone to take him home for the night in the hopes that arrangements could be made today to get him to a safe place. I don’t know what happened with that today; a woman who had just left the Mark Bar was contacted by phone and said she worked with some wildlife organizations and may be able to find a place. Someone else had volunteered just to set it loose in his backyard.

There were at least two more still up there, peeking outside. Somebody called the police, from what I saw there was one actual cop and five or six auxiliaries standing around. After one made a crack about “target practice” and was met with anger from the crowd, they ended up doing nothing. The cop said that since there was no immediate danger it wasn’t their concern.

Another raccoon had also fallen the night before. That time, as I understand it, the police responded and took it, saying it would be euthanized — but that’s second hand. But that’s why the bar staff didn’t want NYPD to be called this time. However, no one could be reached at Animal Control and 311 had no other help to offer.

So there have you.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Hit & Run

(in more ways that one) Anonymous writes:

I ran into one of my old friends tonight and while we were talking about our recent life events, some guy and his girl apparently were arguing in front of the AT&T store in the triangle of Bedford/Nassau/Lorimer. Some other guy on a bike decides to be righteously angry and cold cocks the guy in the face as he rode by. The guy who was punched got knocked cold and hit his head on the bike rack (those upside down U shaped pipe things bolted to the sidewalk that nobody uses) on the way down splitting the back of his head open. Lotsa blood and freaked the g/f out. We called 911, four 94th pc’s showed, FDNY, ambulance, etc. We split once the authorities showed

Description of assailant was white, young, white t-shirt, green army pants on a crappy bike.

Sorry to bring yet another bike shit thing, but…

Hope the dude who got hit is ok, he looked pretty awful.

Never a dull moment in the Garden Spot.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox, Part I: Ticket Blitz In Greenpoint?

May 5, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Anonymous writes:

The local traffic police are out to raise revenue with a vengeance. We have seen them patrolling the streets, car by car, on a SUNDAY, in places like banker & franklin where there are no restrictions on that day, looking for something, anything they can write a ticket against. The kicker was last week, where we parked on West St. because we got back late one night, only to find our car TOWED the next day. Towed, for a place we have parked before dozens of times and have never received a ticket, for allegedly “blocking a crosswalk” where there is no crosswalk. We have good grounds to fight the ticket in court but people should be warned about what’s going on and not take any chances – tickets are one thing, but them TOWING is ridiculous. It’s so obvious that it’s a revenue generator, because in all my years here, I’ve never seen anyone towed, the traffic enforcement ignores the people who do a u turn in the middle of manhattan avenue (or who drive on the wrong side so they can park next to the bank), the people who park in the bus stop – thousands of ticketable offenses that get ignored, and now they’re going to start towing.

The only positive is at least the tow pound is on the B62 route so you don’t have to waste money on car service to get there.

This might sound spurious but— and this is a BIG BUT— as my buddy over at Queens Crap points out in this post it seems to be the current modus operandi nowadays. One would think if our city’s finest wanted to make easy money— and perhaps even protect and serve our community in the process— they’d set up speed traps along McGuinness Boulevard because those new speed limit signs are not doing the job.


Miss Heather

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